The list is cached for the Cache Duration (default 30 minutes). Save the widget settings to clear the cache immediately, or lower the Cache Duration while testing.
Profile, friendship, follow, and user changes clear the cache automatically; a manual profile edit that does not fire those hooks may need a widget save.
It only appears when the BuddyPress Messages component is active, the widget’s “Enable option to wish them” is on, and the viewer is logged in. Logged-out visitors never see it.
The Friends or Followings option is missing from the widget
The two templates (“birthday-greeting” and “birthday-admin-summary”) are created once, automatically, when an admin page loads while the plugin is active. Load any wp-admin page and check again.
Confirm the relevant BuddyPress component (Activity or Notifications) is active.
Confirm the matching option is enabled on the Activity or Notifications tab.
For notifications with Notify Friends Only off, recipients are capped (default 500). Raise or remove the cap with the bb_birthdays_notification_recipient_limit filter if you expect more.
Front-end styles or scripts look stale after an update
Front-end assets are versioned with the plugin version, so a hard refresh or a cache purge (browser and any caching plugin or CDN) resolves a stale copy after upgrading.